Concede

Last night, I went home and apologized. Do I believe that I am wrong? No. I won't go into it, but sometimes we just need to bite our tongues and eat crow to make peace in the house. That is what I had to do. Do I feel better? No. But it does not matter. Everyone else is happy.

Although I read my horoscope daily, I fail to read my Bible verse of the day (backslider). I am a brat with my Brother. Sometimes I feel that He has forgotten me, when it is I who has turned my back on Him. So Jesus, I am sorry for being a bitch. I guess that I am tired of always having to settle and concede. But You did it for us willingly. So who am I? Am I better than You now? Don't thinka so. So I apologize for behaving with You as other members of my family have treated me. I am no better.

Oh. So anyway, I read my bible verse for today (www.biblegateway.com):

“For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.”- Jeremiah 29:11

God is funny. Even after I have been a drunken chain smokin, cussin, selfish, fist fighting bitch, he would still consider me? Well, maybe he is talking to someone else. I don't deserve it.

But what if he would consider me? After so many years of suffering, would he remember me? Why would you? There are people out there who have endured and suffered far worse and have maintained an exceptional level of hope and faith in You. I cannot stomach attending church. I will attend Mass from time to time. Why would you consider an ungrateful, jelly backed bitch like me?

But I would be forever grateful if you did. ;-) For only You can release me.